Writer/Filmmaker & Expat Marco North

Why exactly are you living in forced exile in Russia?

My daughter was kidnapped here five years ago by her mother, now my ex-wife. As my daughter cannot legally leave the country until she is 14, the only way for me to actively be her father and protect her means I have to live in Moscow. I have explored every way to bring my daughter back to the US where she was born, but there is no legal precedent.

Where are you from originally?

Brooklyn!

What is the worst thing about being a single dad?

When I need to understand the nuances of a troubled six-year old girl, I often second-guess myself. Being a single parent is a complete burn-out, a marathon. It just gets very ugly sometimes. You can’t get sick. You have to come up with endless reserves of energy and positivity. You kid sees everything. If you are waking up angry and resentful, they do the same…so if you can wake up and somehow make jokes and pancakes your kid is going to be fine.

What is the best thing about being a single parent?

Doing something very difficult makes you feel like nothing can stop you.

How do you explain to your daughter what is going on between you and her mother?

She is a very intuitive child. She remembers things from when she was three. I am surprised by how much she processes all by herself. We have a lot of quiet, serious talks when I do the listening and she does the talking. I try to make the messy stuff really simple. So far, it works.

How do you balance your family life and your professional life?

I work from home, which means I am not wasting time going to and from an office. I work before my daughter wakes up. I work long after she has gone to sleep, and I take breaks in the middle to do dad stuff. My daughter loves seeing me working, and sometimes she collaborates with me. Making films in our living room feels very natural to me, and to her.

Do you and your daughter both speak fluent Russian?

My daughter speaks fluent English as well as Russian, and can communicate in four other languages. My Russian is great in restaurants, but I never try to speak Russian for anything serious. I destroy the language all the time, unintentionally. What’s funny is this – some Russians completely understand what I am trying to say, others have no idea.

How are Russia and America different, how are they similar?

You know, as many things that are different, there are just as many that are the same – the middle class in America supports the country, and the middle class in Russia barely exists. The corruption, the PR machine and the misperceptions? That’s universal. There are racist Russians and racist Americans. There are good, kind people everywhere.

I will say that lying, cheating and stealing are not frowned upon in Russia. If you get fooled, you are just seen as weak and foolish. There is a harsher morality here – one closer to survival, less about wanting to be perceived as a good, compassionate person. If you smile at someone in the street in Moscow, people think you are either on drugs or just got out of a mental institution.

What is the current project you are working on?

On a personal level - multiple ones. A book of short stories that is almost done. An art book that will combine my photographs with text – it’s a story that will eventually be a film. Creating the outline for a book inspired by my highly successful blog, Impressions of an Expat.

I just launched an independent press - Bittersweet Editions. It is an outgrowth of my longstanding “day job” an agency/design studio called Bittersweet Group. I'll spare the soapbox pitch and just say – it is very artist based, all about supporting the writer the way they wish a press would. We’re way past genres – all about the strength of honest writing in forms common and very uncommon. “Truth lies in words.” That’s our mantra.

How do you define success?

It’s personal. It’s about crossing a threshold and knowing that you have accomplished what you set out to do, and maybe surprised yourself.

How do you handle rejection?

I fully accept the fact that there are people out there that do not connect with what I want to express. If everyone liked what I do, I would probably feel like a failure. Rejection reminds me I am wasting time trying to relate to people who have other interests. I know damn well if I have good work and when I don’t.

Did you always want to be a writer?

Actually, yes. I have a third grade teacher who kept all of these wild stories I wrote and illustrated in his class. It took me a long time to develop, and as I said – pass that threshold. For me, publishing my first novel was a watershed moment.

What inspired you to become a writer?

People confess things to me. I probably could have been a priest. They trust their regrets, their dreams, their secrets to me, and I try to honor them in my writing. I have something of a photographic memory, even for dialogue. I find that writing helps me put the mess of the world in a picture frame, maybe fabricate some perspective on the madness and the joy.

What is the best thing about being one?

Well, the paper is my only real obstacle. To make a film you need money for things like lunch for the crew and locations and makeup. To write a book, the only physical limit is you and maybe a nice pen to write with.

What is the worst thing about being one?

I love writing too much to say anything bad about it.

What is the estimated number of projects you have worked on? 

Large projects – six. Small projects, hundreds.

Who is your favorite author?

I am inspired by Kawabata and Rilke, but my favorite writer is John Fante.

How has your life changed since you became writer?

I would say once I really understood I could write really well, I suddenly felt like I had come home to myself. I also felt a deep responsibility to accomplish something.

What is one piece of advice you can give to someone who also wants to be a writer?

It’s not a vanity process. Ignore the noise. It takes a hell of a lot of hard work and brutal self-criticism to become a solid writer. Trust your instincts. Learn how to know if something works or not without begging other people to tell you.

What do you like to do besides writing?

I have a pretty successful alter-ego -  Martin Ruby. He just recorded the soundtrack to a great little film called Gone Elvis directed by David Newhoff. Martin keeps buying guitars and leaves them in my living room, and then my daughter plays them.

I also cook very seriously. Cooking is the one thing I do every single day to remain sane.

Have you had any other jobs before you decided to become a writer?

Circus worker. Short order cook. Welder. Cinematographer.

How would you describe your education?

Pretty freaking amazing. I went to SUNY Purchase and studied film with some top-notch professors like Tom Gunning and Mimi Arsham, critical theory with guys who were from Yale, photography with Jan Groover, Jed Devine, John Cohen. I followed my heart and mind every single day there, and it has fueled my work for twenty years without any sign of letting up.

What are some of your favorite American films? Foreign films? Television shows?

Badlands by Terrence Malick. Au Hazard, Bathazar by Robert Bresson. Breaking Bad created by Vince Gilligan.

 How would you describe the writing "scene" where you live?

I have no idea. I never really connected with writers this way, even when I lived in NYC.

 How has social media changed the publishing industry?

The obvious democratization is empowering. It also means there are countless books out there now that have not gone through a critical process.

How does independent differ from the mainstream?

I don’t think many independent presses or studios are really independent. They are often just fledgling versions of their mainstream counterparts. Black Sparrow press is an independent press. It always was. I don’t see many new ones like them.

 You could have any first edition book. Which book would it be and why?

Ask the Dust by John Fante. It is the one book that forced me to understand that if you can write, you better do it. No excuses.

Do you believe in life on other planets?

Why the hell not?

What's your favorite movie quote and why?

Peter Falk, in A Woman Under the Influence directed by John Cassavetes. “Here kid, have a beer. Y'll sleep like rocks.” He says this to his young son, in a devastating moment. It’s such a crude gesture – the man has no idea what to do or say – so he just blurts something out. It is just very very human.

 What is your opinion on movie remakes and sequels?

It’s subjective and personal, but I think they are quite foolish – just some cautious marketing people trying to make money. Make a film inspired by an old film – that’s much more interesting.

What is your opinion on book to movie adaptions?

I think it was Mailer who said you give Hollywood a cow and they come back with a cup of beef bullion and say “here, we made your book into a movie”.  Honestly, it depends on the book and the director. The End of the Road by Terry Southern was adapted to film by one of professors, Aram Avakian and I think it was remarkable. There is a film adaptation of the Dostoyevsky novella A Gentle Creature  - Une Femme Douce directed by Robert Bresson. I love both the book and the film.

Is there anything else you would like to add?

Writing my blog Impressions of an Expat every Monday is extremely challenging. Writing something that is deeply personal and honest yet meaningful to an audience of strangers is a very tall order. I live a bizarre life in Moscow. I have stories to tell, about getting dragged to police stations, about falling in love, about the amazing kid I have. I am humbled by the comments and reactions I get each week from readers in over 40 countries. The blog probably saved my life.

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Thank you for doing the interview Marco. I wish you all the best with your projects. I'll do what I can to spread the word about them and blog.  My thoughts/prayers are with you. I hope you'll be able to bring your daughter back to the USA with you soon.